What’s it like to date as a queer femme? Dressing for yourself or others? What about sex?! What does the word “femme” represent? What is the history behind it, and what does it mean today? What about the word “queer”? What are some struggles and the privileges of being a queer femme? What is a queer femme to start with? And what’s the point of talking about them today?
So glad you asked!
Welcome to Life of a Queer Femme—the column that will cover all of the above and more. A small disclaimer: all views and opinions that are discussed in these articles will be based on personal experiences, and in no way indicate that all claims are true for everyone.
The purpose of this series is to share my thoughts on topics that might apply to individuals who identify as queer femme. I will try my best to do as much research and opinion-inclusion as possible, and as much as I will try to not turn this into a “struggles of a queer femme” series, certain issues I find myself facing all too often will come up. At the end of the day, let’s be real— queer femmes aren’t really the first thing many think of when they hear “LGBTQ+” and yet they, together with those who identify as bisexual, make up a huge portion of the LGBTQ+ community.
So who am I and why am I writing this? Not to turn this into a Gossip Girl situation, but let’s turn this into a Gossip Girl situation—queer femme style. I myself am queer and I myself am femme. I have been “out of the closet” for a couple of years now and have gathered a list of experiences and thoughts that somehow keep piling up as I navigate this world of “gay”. I’ve found that many of these stories play out the way they do largely because I am femme, whereas someone who is a little more visibly queer (in the general sense of the word, including all of LGBTQ+ folk) deals with different issues that are no less valid. In hopes of bringing more attention, and potentially even building a community or a safe hub of “that’s relatable”, I am stepping forward to talk about these experiences.
Why is this anonymous? To keep things unbiased. To put it simply: authors influence our opinions of a piece before the first paragraph is even read. Erasing the author from the picture will hopefully erase the bias. The idea behind this focuses on bringing attention to queer femmes, not the person who is voicing the call for attention.
If there is anything you find relatable or would like to see written about, send in your requests, thoughts, complaints, compliments to firstname.lastname@example.org!
I’m excited to see what’s to come!
-Your Queer Femme Friend (Q.F.F.)
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